Let's Hear It For The Boys

The Bay City Rollers (sort of)

Welcome to the clog (conversation log)!

Where two friends talk about pop culture, entertainment, fashion and whatever else strikes our fancy!  My friend Vicki (Senior Director and pop culture aficionado) and I will chat (sometimes mindlessly) about pressing (not really) topics. 

Hope you enjoy it! 

Maria

VICKI:

So we asked our boss what we should talk about this week. Without hesitation, he said “boy bands”. Seemed random. Do you think maybe he used to be in the Bay City Rollers or something?

MARIA:

Who the heck are the Bay City Rollers?

I’m indifferent on boy bands… if the music is good, I’ll sing along.  That being said, it’s so transparent how they try to “cast” a boy for every girl… you know, the sporty one, the cool one, the bad-boy, the baby-face…

VICKI:

I was very young for the Rollers, but I remember a lot of unreasonably tight plaid pants. By the way, a certain meteorologist we know (and her sister) may have sobbed to their mother until Mrs. Day sewed plaid trim on their jeans in tribute to the Scottish dreamboats.  Anyway, there weren’t really many boy bands when I was in my “buy a record because the singer is cute” phase, so I mostly skipped the awkward, voices haven’t broken yet guys and ran squealing straight for the bus full of groupies types.

MARIA:

I on the other hand, was the perfect age for boy band mania.  Having said that, I had to pretend that I didn’t like New Kids On The Block and Back Street Boys because my brother didn’t think they were cool.  How sad is that?

VICKI:

I know your brother. He was lying. Our friend Sarah (hey Sarah!) not only had it so boy band bad she had an NKOTB themed 8th birthday, she’s seeing them this week – on her 32nd!

Also, I kind of hate myself because I know the name of a member of One Direction.

MARIA:

Harry Styles.  Hate myself a little for knowing that too… but can justify the disgrace in the fact that I’m an entertainment reporter and current boy band knowledge is mandatory in my line of work.

On another note, what makes a boy band?  Why aren’t the Rolling Stones or The Killers in the category? They’re all boys.  Serious question…

VICKI:

I think it depends on age – the age of the fan base they’re going for even more so than the age of the band members. Because, let’s face it, bands don’t leave fan bases to chance; they know exactly who their target market is before they sing a note. I think it’s packaging. If it walks like a boy band, and talks like a boy band, then it probably has at least one member whose girlfriend is a beard.

MARIA:

Matching outfits must have something to do with it too, or at least shirts wide open.

Mike (our boss) made a good point too… they don’t usually play instruments either.  That’s not to say they won’t appear in a music video pretending to strum a guitar as they serenade a girl in their target demographic.

VICKI:

I think if their fans threaten their girlfriends (and each other) on twitter, they’re probably in a boy band. Bet Mike didn’t have to put up with that shit when he was in the Bay City Rollers. I think they’re fine, even necessary for young girls who’re just discovering practice kissing on their hands, but I’m always a bit melancholy when a former boy band is touring far past their sell-by date. I don’t want to see guys my age doing hip thrusts and choreographed dance routines while I’m trying to remember if I took my Celebrex.

MARIA:

Yeah, but you know, 43 is the new 17, or something like that.  I’m not sure if it’s nostalgic or pathetic that groups like BSB, NKOTB and 98 Degrees are touring this year.  Did some kind of memo go out imploring former boy bands to re-band? Is there a shortage? Is One Direction not fulfilling their duties?  Should we start calling them man bands?

VICKI:

No, we should not. There’s money in re-banding. But if I see you in an NKOTB tshirt the next time we go for coffee *editor’s note – she just sang The Right Stuff, complete with desk choreography* you’re on friend probation.

MARIA:

Deal, only if you promise never to tell my brother I know the song… it would kill him inside.

DISCLAIMER:
Our boss, Mike Elgie, was not actually in the Bay City Rollers... but if he had been he would have been the coolest one.

The Viral File

And just in case you’re here for today’s viral videos, here you go…

An ode to Facebook…

Fancy footwork…

This is still funny…

Thanks for stopping by!

Maria